Tomato Jokes and Riddles

Since 2010, Tomato Dirt has garnered 4.6+ million views, making it the web’s leading online source for growing tomatoes in the home garden. Award-winning writer and Tomato Dirt owner Kathy Widenhouse has helped thousands of home gardeners grow healthier tomatoes. Be one of them when you get Tomato Dirt’s Growing Guide here.

Q: What did the papa tomato say to the baby tomato?
A: “Hurry and ketchup!”

Q: Why did the tomato go out with a prune?
A: Because he couldn’t find a date.

Q: How do you fix a sliced tomato?
A: Use tomato paste.

Q. Why did the tomato blush?
A. Because he saw the salad dressing.

Q: What did the macaroni say to the tomato?
A: “Don’t get saucy with me!”

Q. What’s the difference between knowledge and wisdom?
A. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Q. How do you get rid of unproductive tomatoes?
A. Can them.

Q: Does Santa like to grow tomatoes?
A: YES -- he gets to hoe, hoe, hoe!

Q: What is red and goes up and down?
A: A tomato in an elevator.

Q: Why did Mrs. Tomato turn red?
A: She saw Mr. Green Pea over the back fence.

Q. Why is a tomato round and red?
A. Because if it was long, skinny, and green, it would be a bean.

Q. How life is like ketchup?
A. Like ketchup, good things in life come slow and are worth waiting for.

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